If we were having tea // exams!! + hospital visit + I miss my friends :(

Apparently y’all really like reading about my life even though nothing actually happens in it.

I was unsure about what to post today and put up polls on Twitter and Instagram asking people to vote, and (as of right now) “life update” got the most votes.* Not sure why I even put it up since I’m mostly staying at home and having a boring life??? But since you asked, I’ll have to now come up with something to update y’all on.

*votes for a discussion post are a close second, though. I might do a discussion post soon, I do have some Thingsโ„ข to say.

So grab your choice of drink and settle down to catch up with me for a bit.

Usually I start every point with “if we were having tea…” but I’m thinking I’ll write the post like a normal (albeit, one-sided) conversation today. Let me know what you guys think about this way of writing.

pouring hot tea gif

HI. First of all, can I please complain about my exams because I’m so ANNOYED AND STRESSED. That’s literally my mood all the time now. HOW does it make sense to keep physical examinations in the middle of a pandemic?? I have to worry about transport and making sure I don’t drink much water so that I won’t have to go to the bathroom for hours and social distancing etc. while also stressing over studies.

The committee which decided that final semester exams have to be held and without proper exams our degrees will not be valid are stuck in an old system. They were the ones who made continuous evaluation a thing after recognizing that one semester cannot make or break a degree and YET they turn around and say that our degrees would mean nothing without written exams for 8th semester students. Hypocrites.

frustrated gid
this is literally me though.

With all this, my college is being extra annoying and has asked us all to go to campus to submit FORMS that can easily be done online. They asked us to come on two different days the week before exams for simple form submission and getting a stamp. Do they even care about their health at this point?? We rebelled and got it down to one day but it’s still nonsensical. I’m not done being angry about it.

Every situation that normally causes stress and anxiety is even worse now because of the pandemic. Another example: my health. The swelling on my neck increased quite a bit in the past few weeks, enough to make me anxious about it. I had planned on getting the surgery done in April but put it on a hold because COVID-19 cases started to rise here. I thought it would be safe to get the surgery done a couple months later, you know? None of us expected that we’d be stuck at home for several months.

I did consult my doctor online and she prescribed some medication which did not work. There are no other meds for it because the only permanent solution is surgery. But of course, right as my swelling starts to give trouble, my exams are around the corner. I wouldn’t recover on time to write my exams so the surgery cannot be done now.

But a few days back, my swelling increased and started causing pain. I really wanted to get some of the liquid aspirated so mum and I went on an emergency trip to the hospital for that on Wednesday. Turns out the pain was from a muscle on my neck which became tensed and inflamed because it had to support the heavy weight of the swelling for a long time. I’m mostly resting my neck now so it should go down soon.

Thankfully, the swelling’s size is smaller and more manageable now so I’m not worried about it increasing a lot and getting in the way of my exams. But yeah, we can’t keep aspirating. The surgery has to be done ASAP. We need to start planning for it right after exams.

It’s like nothing happened since March and suddenly EVERYTHING comes together in August. Exams, health issues, new stuff at workโ€”it’s making me into an unorganized mess.

There is one highlight to exams, though. I’ll be seeing friends after several months. We have decided that we won’t congregate and will social distance. But just seeing them from six feet away will be huge. I’m glad that all my friends are as paranoid as me about health and COVID-19. I can trust these people, unlike some others who I know will not be wearing masks properly/at all or won’t social distance.

shaking head gif

That’s my biggest fear about exams, to be honest. It’s hundreds of students coming together, a major portion of them from other states who may or may not have quarantined themselves for two weeks. And there will definitely be people who consider themselves immune or aren’t serious about coronavirus.

I am going to be SUPER paranoid the whole time. I’m pretty sure that I’ll be stressed about hygiene more than the exam itself and will probably write the bare minimum I can to pass and leave the room ASAP. Just imagining myself in the room with people everywhere and papers exchanging several hands… *shudder*

I promise this “life update” was supposed to be about more things but I’m just VERY PARANOID okay???? And this is the only thing happening in my life right now!

Plus, my internship is still going on so I’m working on weekdays until 18th. When I’m not working, I’m either studying or stressing about studying. More of the latter than the former, if I’m being honest.

All that has definitely eaten into my free time because I didn’t read much in the past week. My TBR consists of some hard books right now but because of my health and exams, all I want is happy books. So I’ve gone back to reading romance. I need some serotonin boost right now because my brain is not coping well.

rapunzel picking books from a shelf gif
me with romance books right now.

Honestly, I really do need a break. I’m on leave from work until 28th which gives me three days to sleep and recover after exams. It’s going to be a mini-vacation.

Although I’ve mostly been at home, I haven’t really been resting for the last few weeks. My mind has been constantly thinking about exams and blogging and posting on social media.

Let’s put aside my feelings about Instagram for a second and talk about how blogging is also an added task. I’ve been (almost) consistently blogging thrice a week since January. When I take a day off, I blog an extra day the next week.

While this blog is currently not a stress point for me, it still takes up considerable space in my brain. I do have to manage studying, working, and reading with this. Posting thrice a week means that I spend at least three hours a week on blogging. Then there’s making graphics, reading books to review on the blog, sharing links and keeping up with linked social mediaโ€”it can be a chore.

Some bloggers call blogging a second job that doesn’t pay and I understand why!

I might take a break from blogging sometime, or at least slow down a bit. I still want to blog thrice a week and have enough to share, but I’m not sure I’m completely happy with my content right now. There’s been a consistent schedule so far, even with the type of posts going up decided beforehand, and I’m starting to get bored.

While I boast about not sticking this blog to a niche, there isn’t much I talk about other than books anymore. And I don’t want that. I want to get back to talking more about life, talking about Kdramas, and maybe post more blogging advice posts. It’s time that I step back and switch things up a little. Few changes are already underway, but I definitely want to do more.

In case you don’t know about the tiny changes:

  • I stopped sharing monthly bullet journal setups. I’m not using my bullet journal much right now and I can see that its not getting enough interest as well. No point in continuing that.
  • Instead, I’m doing monthly wrap-ups, which I’m actually quite excited about! I did the first one for July.
  • I want to include more graphics and dividers in my posts, rather than just using a line divider, so I spent some time making a few of those. Can’t wait to use them more in my posts.
  • The blog’s theme is different! I was just so bored with my old one that I impulsively changed it, and I like the blog’s look much more now.

So yeah, switching things up on the blog has been on my mind as well. I just haven’t had a lot of time to completely decide what I want to change/introduce yet.

You know what I really need right now? What all us students need? For exams to get cancelled without our degrees being printed with “passed due to COVID-19”. We’ve done the assignments and we’ve proven ourselves over the last seven semesters where we had more credits than we do now. There is a case in the Supreme Court contesting the decision to hold exams but with the way the Indian judicial system works, I’m sure that the decision will be made after all exams are done. Our system is not good at taking decisions fast.

We can only hope but I’ve accepted that exams will be happening.

At least hold the exams online, you know?! But apparently the technological university I’m under doesn’t have the infrastructure for that. Wow.

accessories divider graphic

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Enough about my exams. If we were chatting right now, what would YOU tell me? What’s been going on in your life?

25 thoughts on “If we were having tea // exams!! + hospital visit + I miss my friends :(”

  1. I relate to this so much!!! I also need a stamp to be allowed to take my huge final exam next month, and somehow it is taking the university people WEEKS to read through my transcript, check that I have really passed all the necessary courses, and give me that stamp ๐Ÿ™ˆ And all the driving to check whether they are done yet is seriously annoying, especially since I could be using the time to study and we are in the middle of a pandemic… So yeah, I get that you are frustrated! ๐Ÿ˜…
    Still, I hope all your exams go well, that the other students take social distancing seriously, and that your neck feels better soon! โค

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ok this sucks!!! I hope your neck gets better and you don’t have to deal with added pain during exams<3 And good luck for your exams! I've no hopes of the court responding to the request before the exams start๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™€๏ธ

    Liked by 2 people

  3. sending positive thoughts! i am glad you’ve found romance novels to be helpful. also, as a new blogger, seeing bloggers step back and taking breaks and/or reconfiguring their schedules makes me feel better about not posting everyday (because although my views go up when i post everyday, i find that the quality of my content goes down).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! That is definitely something we all notice. It’s a battle between quality vs quantity. One tip I read somewhere when I started out was: “don’t worry about quality or length, just blog/write every day and post. After you have about 50 posts, you can slow down and step back.” I actually followed that and it helped because: 1. By then you would have enough posts in your blog for people to binge-read and 2. it will help you realize what your style is, what you’re more interested in, and what direction you want to go in.

      This was just something that helped me, but feel free to do what works best for you!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m sorry but I enjoyed reading your rant ๐Ÿ™ˆ๐Ÿ™ˆ I hope your neck heals well and you run races in your living room in no time ๐Ÿ’š as for the exams it sucks ๐Ÿคจ there is no other option cz they keep acting like idiots about it … I know and feel the blogging thing not paying ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ but we’re here to read and support you anytime ๐Ÿ’š๐Ÿ’š get well soon
    Oh and
    PS : the paranoia I get it 100%

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ah lowkey LOVE this and that you shared this xx I just went back to uni so feel you on the school stress *nervous sweats* NOT feeling it either so YES PLESE. Let it end haha. Exams suck so wishing you luck

    Like

  6. Ah lowkey LOVE this and that you shared this xx I just went back to uni so feel you on the school stress *nervous sweats* NOT feeling it either so YES PLEASE. Let it end haha. Exams suck so wishing you luck

    Like

  7. Ooh itโ€™s sooo annoying that you have to take physical examinations. Good luck with your exams! I hope your neck heals as soon as possible! I honestly loved reading this post! Itโ€™s good to know that uni sucks for everyone in some way or another ๐Ÿ˜‚. Wish you all the best!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. [โ€ฆ] BUT, I also saw someone comment something similar to this somewhere recently: itโ€™s kind of better to post a lot when you first start, and then once you start getting the following, you can slow down. That way, your new posts will hook them and result in follows, and then they can go look through all those older posts that you first did. (Update: It was Sumedha who mentioned this in a comment on her life update post) [โ€ฆ]

    Like

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